When I was diagnosed, I swore myself this wouldn't become a blog about chronic illness and Fibro and poor me I'm sick wahwahwah. But I swear to God, on days like today it's all I can fucking think about. I don't want to let it rule my life but somehow it manages to screw things up on a daily basis.
Today, I told my boss about it. I hadn't done it because I didn't want him to think I was trying to make excuses for stuff that may have gone wrong in the last few months, or that I wanted to be treated differently, or that I wanted him to feel sorry for me or whatever. But sadly, things have gotten so bad that I was forced to tell him, mostly because he needs to know that some days I just don't feel good, that some days the pain won't even let me walk and I'll need to stay home. Stuff that gets in the way of my work and that maybe he didn't know why it was happening. And he was very understanding and supportive and nice, but now I can't help but wonder, did I do the right thing? Because believe me, I could hear the pity in his voice. Or maybe it's just me. I don't know.
Plus, I can't walk straight today. The pain in my back is just too awful. I got a shot of diclofenac and another one of dexamethasone, and 2 hours later the pain isn't even slightly better. I'm at the office right now only because I cannot even walk to the bus.
But enough self-pitying! I haz new stuffz that makes me happy!! I haven't taken any peektures, but I can tell you I have a new Knit Picks Options Interchangeable Needle set!! the nickel plated one, and it' great. I can't wait to start something with it. But I don't think I'm going to until I finish this:
My first pair of socks! Yay!
The Pattern is Los Monos Locos by Jennifer O'Sullivan. It is such a great pattern! Toe-up on 2 circs, just the way I like it. But, since this is my first pair of socks, I decided I was going to do them one at a time. My next pair will hopefully be knit 2 at a time.
Plus, I got lots of pretty stuffz in the mail yesterday: The Opinionated Knitter, Knitting circles Around Socks, 2 skeins of STR and a whole lot of other things! I might be able to photograph them tomorrow so I can post some peektures. :)
And well, that's it for today, I hope. Or maybe when I get home the mailman will have brought me some more stuffz, right?
yay for socks and new needles! (heheh that sounds kinda funny, but you know what i mean!) im sorry youre having such a rough go right now...*hugs*
i tagged you in a game on my blog! come play :)
Posted by: jovi | November 10, 2008 at 01:40 PM
Hugs, sweetie. I can understand about the Fibro blog/life-angst stuff. Just hope youre doing better, and that my thoughts are with you.
Posted by: OneHotProcessor (Sara) | November 14, 2008 at 09:53 AM
I hope you're doing better -- haven't seen you on Ravelry in a while!
Also, just checking in on that swap from a couple of months ago -- did you send that swap package to me, because it hasn't arrived yet.
Posted by: Gladys | January 16, 2009 at 10:30 AM